Everything changed with what he saw. In that moment it was like a broken mirror was placed against his heart. The reflection wasn’t what he expected and he was pained by its revelation. There was dirt along with selfishness; however it was the need for love that broke his heart.

Rain gushed out of already overflowing drainpipes that ran down the brick wall of the building where he had just spent the last couple of nights. Cigarette butts and plastic bottles were among the litter that rode the torrent which rushed around his shoes and into a cracked sewer entrance a few meters away between the road and footpath. As he ran towards the subway station he decided he wouldn’t let this weather deter him, it was the last night in this city and he had made plans.

He felt weak as he reflected on what he saw. Not just what he saw with his eyes, but his intentions that brought him to that place. He wondered if he was partly to blame.

The streetlights had lit up the roadside well before the sun had gone down. There was plenty of natural light to guide him out of the station and into some of the smaller city streets. Street vendors lined the entrance ways to the narrow paths that separated the large mono colored city blocks. Water was running off their canvas coverings with the sounds of steam sizzling from the drops that found a path to the hot plates with frying chicken, rice dishes and other snacks. As he looked around he felt his senses heighted, the smell, the view, as well as the sense of being completely carefree.

All he could feel now was a strange sense of love, a sad love, not traditional, more like compassion. Like the way God must feel when he sees our secret hurts. He didn’t set out with this love and he never intended to display it. He felt guilty. The night was for taking an opportunity that was often associated with love but in this situation really isn’t.

He paced through the alley. Quick enough to try and make time, but not too quick as to kick up water onto his clothes and wet his shoes more than they already were. He considered this event to be the perfect way to cap off a good holiday, and was pleased he made friends who introduced other friends who, well, led to this evening. He was brimming with self-confidence when he approached the building, and while walking had been running through smart ways to make a good first impression. He was fairly sure it would be a successful night, considering the conversations he’d had and the photos he’d seen.

True love will set you free and he knew he wasn’t there to offer any.

As she opened the door he liked the low cut dress she was wearing and knew things were looking good for him. She stretched out her arm to greet him. It was here he suddenly acquired those eyes of God. Everything changed with what he saw. In that moment it was like a broken mirror was placed against his heart. The reflection wasn’t what he expected and he was pained by its revelation. In it there was dirt along with selfishness; however it was a new sense of the need for love that broke his heart. Her open weakness and evident cry for love was written with black stitching that held together the fresh wounds seen on her wrist. “Don’t worry about that, I’m fine,” she looked at him. “Are you going to come in or just stand in the rain?” He didn’t move.

True love would set her free and he knew he wasn’t there to offer any.